ADVERTISEMENT

Hey Mick! Show Me The Snake

Fanning’s Female Fan Club Lights Up In Response To His Sandy-Bottom Discovery

HEY THERE MICK, WANA GO ON A DATE?!

I REALLY WANA RIDE YOUR PERFECT SNAKE

Mick I know it’s fresh, you’re finally single and maybe even ready to mingle. It can be daunting even scary for some, when a love comes undone. Since you have been hitched the times have changed, Tinder is a thing these days. If you play your cards right you might get a few nibbles. I just want to warn you, be careful out there. Watch out for the users and abusers all with their eyes on your surfy blonde hair.

I’m a little worried, some girls are only out for your bucks. Your perfectly chiselled jaw, understated grin and sparkling blue eyes (that just match the ocean perfectly) are kind of hot commodities in any handsome male stud. The 3 world titles and subsequent rig might make some cougars lick their lips.

This is a message just so you know that some ladies out there are keen to take it slow. Breakups are tough, even tougher than shark boxing but sometimes we all need a shoulder to cry on. Never fear Mick Fanning I am here!

I do have to warn you, I’m not one for long walks on the beach, holding hands or valentine’s day. I’m more of the adventurous type, so maybe instead of staring into your baby blues, and you showing me how well you can stroke…..into a wave. We could go on an adventure? I heard you have been on a few lately and you found a long snake! You know what Mick I’ll be that rebound girl, you can take me on a date, but only if you take me to the secret Snake. 

Could the right seductress get Mick to reveal the location of The Snake?

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
SUBSCRIBE TO TRACKS
A bi-monthly eclectic tome of tangible surfing goodness that celebrates all things surfing, delivered to your door!
SUBSCRIBE NOW
HAPPENINGS
Your portal to cultural events happening in and around the surfing sphere.
Find Events
SUBSCRIBE TO TRACKS
A bi-monthly eclectic tome of tangible surfing goodness that celebrates all things surfing, delivered to your door!
SUBSCRIBE NOW
HAPPENINGS
Your portal to cultural events happening in and around the surfing sphere.
Find Events

LATEST

The Goons of Doom and DJ Eddy are firing up again after the Easter weekend carnage in Torquay.

Tributes have poured in for the Australian whose boards had been ridden by many top professionals.

URBNSURF is bringing wave garden technology to the city's Olympic Park.

A look at the victims of the mid year cut and which nations are left on tour.

ADVERTISEMENT

PREMIUM FEATURES

The distilled surfing memories of Dave Sparkes.

Peter Townsend with G&S

"Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far."

TRACKS PREMIUM

Get full access to every feature from our print issues, read classic Tracks issues from the 70s, 80s and 90’s, watch all of our classic films & more …

TRACKS PREMIUM

Get full access to every feature from our print issues, read classic Tracks issues from the 70s, 80s and 90’s, watch all of our classic films & more …

CLASSIC ISSUES

A threat to Angourie, the death of vibes, and a tongue in cheek guide on how to become a surf star.

PREMIUM FILM

YEAR: 2008
STARRING: JOEL PARKINSON, MICK FANNING AND DEAN MORRISON

This is the last time the original cooly kids were captured together and features some of their best surfing.

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

PRINT STORE

Unmistakable and iconic, the Tracks covers from the 70s & 80s are now ready for your walls.

Tracks
Kandui Resort Interstitial