Ahh the life of a professional surfer/brand ambassador. What a drag. Rolling from one exotic locale to the next, nailing a few engagements before waiting for the phone to ring to advise of your next truly torturous destination.

Laura Enever, Flick Palmateer and Alessa Quizon must’ve been utterly devastated to learn they were all off to pack perfect sand bottom drainers in Mexico.

Apologies for the lowly sarcasm, it’s a common side effect of acute jealousy.